Unexpected side effects of losing weight

You may remember when I wrote my Unexpected side effects of roller derby post. Well I've recently encountered a few side effects of losing weight and thought I'd share. Some of these may just be me and my body, but I'm sure some are relate-able.

1. Fat comes off wherever the hell it pleases. I once heard that you lose weight first from the places you gained it last. This may be true; it was a long time ago when I packed on this fat so I have no idea what order it slapped itself on. What I do know is that my ass is disappearing at an alarming rate and I became fully aware of this when I slammed down directly on it and there was not nearly enough badonkadonk to cushion the fall.
2. Food is less tasty. I vaguely remember reading some study about fat people wherein they determined that as you gain weight, your brain starts thinking food tastes better and better. (Thanks for looking out, brain!) This could be why thin people stay thin. Food is still good to me, but not like it was. Seriously people, I used to love food. LOVE IT. Lately though, things just don't taste as good and fruit seems to be the only thing I really enjoy.
3. You might get whiplash from double takes. This one is awesome. For real. I can't tell you how many times I have walked past my reflection and whipped my head around to make sure I didn't mistake what I was seeing. "My stomach really does look like that and I'm not even sucking it in!"
4. Your brain has a hard time catching up to your body. You know you've lost weight. The scale says so, your significant other says so, but chances are you still have "fat brain". Fat brain is what makes you think you still wear the same size when you shop or tells you that you that you still need to wear that tent dress in the closet instead of buying something new and cute that actually fits.
5. You realize you had fat in places you didn't think were that fat. I've heard a lot of comments about losing weight in my face. I honestly never thought my face was fat, but looking back at pictures I do look bloated. Also, my wrists and hands are bonier and vein-ier. Yeah, thanks body. I was super concerned about my fat hands. I'd like to go ahead and hang onto these saddle bags though.
6. My life used to be about eating and now it's about eating. This goes back more tasty vs. less tasty foods and being fat. I loved eating because things tasted so good, how could I not finish it? Now my relationship with food has more to do with fueling my body for activity and making sure I'm consuming optimal amounts for weight loss and roller derby. 
7. Exercise guilt. I used to have food guilt (ex: why did I eat that?!), but now I have exercise guilt. I could go to the gym or practice 12 days in a row and still feel guilty when I miss number 13. I know my body needs the rest sometimes, but I might gain all that weight back if I miss today!!!

As always, I'd love if to hear if you have other ones to add. I hope to do a part 2 to this when I finally get near my goal!

Crunch time

Photo Credit to
James Calder Photography

I have been on this roller derby journey for almost exactly one year and in that very short time I have: put on skates for the first time in about a decade, worked my butt off just to learn the most basic skills, completed the meat camp of a WFTDA charted team, passed my assessment to become a real league member, was drafted by a home team, and for my first home team season, I was lucky enough to be able to play in every single home team bout.

... but that could all change. In a little less than 3 weeks, my team will take the track with the goal of taking home our league's Skate of the Union championship trophy. While my team is incredible and supportive, they're also very competitive. Some would say to a fault, but those people are usually on other teams. This means that when May 12th rolls around, you can guarantee that 14 ready skaters will be on the roster and I want to be one of them.

I know that as a rookie I am just as much, if not more, on the cusp than some of the other incredible women on my team. After all, nearly half of my team is on the All Stars, another 2 have been on the travel team at some point, and several more could if they wanted to. There is no shortage of talent on my team.

I've learned at this point that my own mental limitations do more damage to my skating than any physical ones, but with the help of my team I'm starting to realize I'm faster, stronger, and know more than I give myself credit for. Now it's just a matter of remembering that every time I put my skates on.

I'll be busting my ass these next three weeks, but maybe this focus is what I need. Whether I am rostered or not, I'll at the very least be more focused and have a good start on next season.

p.s. I'm not saying I'll be very happy about not being rostered. I'm allergic to losing in any capacity, but I guess I will take it in stride. Wish me luck.

21 roller derby truths

Because I like lists and I'm on a new supplement that feels a bit like Adderall, I don't know if I could actually write paragraphs that make sense. Instead, I'm going to list some "derby truths," aka things that I'm fairly certain most derby girls can relate to:

1. Roller derby is the best thing you will ever do for yourself
2. Some days of practice will really suck, no matter how great you get.
3. Some days of practice will be really awesome, no matter how bad you think you suck.
4. You do actually have to come and participate in practice to get better.
5. You do actually have to put in time outside of practice to get better.
6. You will always learn more when you shut your mouth.
7. No one wants to be your partner if you quit before the drill even begins. (#1 pet peeve of mine)
8. Yes, everyone is giving you the stink eye when you quit the drill to stretch.
9. Yes, you will fail/suck at something a thousand times before you finally get it/perfect it.
10. It really does take a year to have a good base understanding the game of roller derby.
11. Train your hamstrings and not just your quads if you want that low back pain to go away and your derby stance to be lower.
12. Your team/league has faith in you, that's why you're there. You owe it to them to work hard and prove that they were right to choose you.
13. No one outside of roller derby will understand why you are so obsessed with roller derby.
14. If you eat a cracker and a salad before practice, you will regret it. (Would you not put gas in your car before a road trip?)
15. If you eat a McDonald's value meal before practice, you will regret it. (Would you let half of the air out of your tires before a drive?)
16. Fifty people will show you how to do a skill before one of their explanations finally clicks.
17. Fresh meat: Listen to a vet's advice. They have dealt with every situation you have, and then some.
18. No one starts their derby career as Suzy Hotrod.
19. Eventually you will dream of hip checking people everywhere.
20. No matter how much you hate it, jamming will help you be a better derby player.
21. Derby is motherfucking awesome. (sorry family, but there were no synonyms in the thesaurus)

... annnnd, I'm spent. Feel free to add on below :)